I was reading a story about when Oprah was a small child. She was watching her grandmother boil clothes ‘in a big cast-iron pot in the yard.” Then, her grandmother would pull the steaming clothes out of the pot and hang them on the clothes line to dry. Oprah remembers her grandmother telling her to come and watch how she was doing this because … one day Oprah would have to know how to do this for herself.
As Oprah watched, she says, “A still, small voice inside of me, really more of a feeling than a voice said, “This will not be your life. Your life will be more than hanging clothes on a line. Oprah goes on to say that she really wanted to be a teacher. She wanted to be known for inspiring her students, and she refers to this deep feeling or conviction as a divine assurance.
Are you one of those people who has had this feeling of ‘divine assurance’? Somewhere deep down inside of you there is a feeling, a sense of purpose and you know exactly how your life will unfold.
I’ve met people who have had this sense of deep conviction, as if it was their destiny to do what they are doing. I met a woman recently who told me that from the age of five, she instinctively knew that she was meant to be a doctor.
I remember coaching a budding entrepreneur who had immigrated to Canada from Britain. He told me how his teacher took the class on a field trip to the Tower of London, in England to see the crown jewels. He was 12. “When I pressed my nose up to the glass,” he said, “I was in awe.” He told me it was in that moment he knew he would be a goldsmith and design exquisite jewelry for the rich and famous.
In the past, when I heard stories about people who had this profound conviction, this incredible sense of purpose, about what they wanted to do or be … I used to feel excitement and then I’d fall into a deep depression. I used to think, “What about me? What am I supposed to be doing with my life?” There were no ‘ah ha’ moments growing up. No epiphanies upon graduation. No sparks of inspiration telling me, ‘This is your destiny!’ How was I ever going to find my purpose?
As a child, I was incredibly shy, a total introvert with zero confidence. And yet, here I was teaching. I had started my career as a teacher. (My mother made me do it). I found standing in front of a classroom of students, painfully difficult. I managed to stay for a few years and then moved into the private sector. Don’t ask why … but I ended up landing a job in sales and customer service. Not the best choice for someone who wanted to blend in with the wall paper. So, I moved back to the familiarity of the classroom. However, that would only be for a short while.
Every time I moved from teaching into the private sector, I ended up with jobs that took me more and more out of my comfort zone. The more I wanted to retreat into myself, the more I was pushed out. All around me I heard people talking about finding their passion, finding their purpose, but not me …
One day, a counsellor I was speaking with said, “Why don’t you review every job? Write it down along with the job description and skills you used”. “That will take me forever” I cried.
For many of us, deep self-reflection is not easy; however, I was determined. As I began to make notes, page after page after page, I began to see a pattern. A tiny thread that wove through one job to the next. What I had turned away from at the very beginning was the very thing I was coming back to in one form or another. Who knew ‘teaching’ was actually it.
Some people like the woman who knew she would be a doctor, the young man who became a goldsmith or celebrities like Oprah have an early sense of how their life will unfold. I used to call them the ‘lucky one’ because they knew their purpose. I don’t say that anymore.
We all have a purpose in life, it just takes some of us longer to find it. For me, it was a whack on head through deep self-reflection. Looking back, I can now see my purpose was there … right at the beginning of my career in teaching and training. What an eye-opener! What an incredible journey. To spend years searching for something, only to discover it’s been in front of you the entire time.