7 Self Talk Sins that Lead to Self Sabotage

Did you know that there are  7 self talk sins that lead to self sabotage?  Thousands of thoughts run through your mind every day, and if left unchecked, some of these thoughts can be lethal to your well- being.

“Somebody should tell us, right at the start of our lives that we are dying. Then we might live life to the limit, every minute of the day.”
Michael Landon, Actor, Director, Producer & Writer

What are you doing to live your life to the limit? When you wake up in the morning, what words flash onto your mental mind map? Are the conversations inside your head guiding you in the direction of success and well-being in your career, as well as in your relationships with family, friends and co-workers? Or, are you sabotaging yourself?

These conversations, this internal dialogue, is what we refer to as self-talk. Self talk runs 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year. It never stops. Self-talk can be positive, help us get focused, motivated and geared to experience success. Self talk can also sabotage, moving us in the opposite direction. It can be negative and distracting, causing anxiety and mental stress; convincing us we have no power.

How do you know when your self talk is sabotaging you? Here are 7 sins of self sabotage to look out for.

1. 1. Listening to negative internal talk. Getting entangled in the should’ves, could’ves and the why didn’t they … loop round and round in your head, unchecked and unexamined. Put your thinking into the present, experience each moment and what it has to offer.
   2. Lending an ear to whiners, complainers, doomsayers, gossips. Giving mental and emotional space to people who always tear down, never build up; who take, and never support. You need these people like you need a hole in the head. Move on.
   3. Constantly apologizing about what you have done, said, or thought. This loop of apologizing will do you no favours, except to remind others of your shortcomings. Change channels. Give yourself a new program.
   4. Allowing yourself to be intimidated into doing or acting in accordance with what others want. There are many different forms of intimidation; three common tactics are bullying, shaming and guilt. You need to do serious assessment on why you are letting yourself be abused by these clowns. Get help.
   5. Avoiding confrontation because of fear. Afraid that doing something will ‘upset’ the present situation and the situation will get worse.  In one of his early books, Dr. Wayne Dyer said, “Fear itself does not exist in the world. There are only fearful thoughts and avoidance behaviours.”
   6. Saying ‘yes’ to someone or something when your body is telling you ‘No’. Take up mediation, yoga, contemplation exercises to help you get in touch with yourself and develop inner strength.
   7. Never wanting to hurt other peoples’ feelings because they might decide you are not a nice person or a good person. Wow. So, you hurt yourself instead. Wanting everyone to like you will cause you nothing but grief. Stop this self-torture. Start speaking up.

We spend more time with ourselves than with anyone else, and what we say to ourselves on a habitual basis matters. How we perceive and experience the outside is determined by our ‘inside’. Be aware of the dialogue that spins around in your head.  Internal dialogue just doesn’t stay hidden inside, but radiates out through voice and body language. Your tone, smile posture, how you look or don’t look can shout volumes to those around you about your level of confidence, your feelings of worth and value. Kick out habits of self sabotage.  Self talk has power. Use it to live your life to the max and experience success to the fullest.

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